• 
  
  holding head up
• rolling over
• sitting up without tipping
• crawling
• walking

• mastery of walking
• running
• marching
• jumping, hopping
• climbing

• skipping
• hopping
• catching
• throwing
• This is also when other related factors begin to emerge and become new skills for children to master such as:  
• coordination
• strength
• balance
• endurance
• flexibility
  

• batting at a mobile
• grasping/grabbing for objects
• holding objects
• transferring objects from one hand to the other.
• pincher grips (using the index finger and thumb to grab that Cheerio)
• pushing buttons
• working on turning pages of a board book

• stacking small blocks
• eating with utensils
• beginning to hold writing utensils to make marks on paper (which, they also love to tear and rip…another great muscle builder)

• writing
• drawing
• cutting (in any form)
• playing with Playdoh
• building with Legos

"Monkey Mind" is a popular yoga phrase to describe when the brain swings from thought to thought, unable to focus. Left to the wilds, Monkey Mind can provoke intense distraction that hijacks the brain and veers humans towards increased agitation. Unfortunately, the fast pace of people's daily lives combined with widespread mental health conditions (ADD, ADHD, depression, anxiety, etc.) can cause children and adults to feel frequently overwhelmed. However, simple techniques of breathing, visualization, and movement can clear distraction, quiet the mind, and bring a sense of calm. But how do you engage children in the practice of mindfulness? Play...with the Monkey Mind Pirates method!

Monkey Mind Pirates is an innovative approach to combining playfulness with mindfulness that is based in simple ideas you can try at home with your children to cultivate calm.

Turning into senses:
Many meditation sessions begin by ringing a chime or a bell that produces a sustained tones. focusing attention on the sound can clear the mind of distracting or aggravating thoughts. Children can practice closing their eyes and listening to the bell, raising their hands when they first hear the ringing disappear and the silence emerge. In a group of children, each can take turns ringing the chime or bell and describing their experience of listening to quiet.

Seeing the Breath:
Breathing is one of the most powerful tools to combat stress bu may not be an activity that interests children on its own. Children make deeper connections to their breath when they can see and feel the action of the breath. Ask children to hold an imaginary ball with both hands. Using your own hands, demonstrate how the ball expands on the inhale and contracts on the exhale. Encourage the children to match the size of the ball's expansion and contraction with the length of their inhaling and exhaling. The Hoberman Sphere, available in toy stores (and seen in the Museum lobby!) is a collapsible plastic ball that also can mimic this expanding, contracting action.

Moving Meditation:
Often, meditative practices state stillness as an objective towards reaching the goal of calm. Although complete stillness may be difficult for young people to attain, many children like to play with moving in different speeds -- including slow motion. You can guide children to slow down by making it a game. Begin by turning on music and asking them to walk around the room in any pattern without talking. Periodically, call out instructions, such as, "As slow as you're moving, slow it down," until they are barely moving. To extend the experience, experiment with moving back and forth between slow and fast, always ending with slow motion. Afterward, ask children to describe the experience and what they noticed at the different speeds.

Drawing on the power of image and metaphor:
Metaphors such as Monkey Mind Pirates can provide children with language to talk about stressors in their lives in a story-based way. For example, children can create a character that represents how they feel when they are stressed. The character can take any form that the child suggests -- an imaginary creature, an animal, a person. Adults can encourage the child by asking questions: What is the character's name? What does it look and sound like? How does it move? What does it like to say? The child can draw pictures, tell stories, and act out events to bring the character to life. Adults can then refer to the character as a base for on-going conversations about the child's stress level.

An added benefit to practicing mindfulness with your children is that you get to develop some of the same skills along with them. The next time you find yourself at the end of your rope, take a moment to focus your awareness on your breathing. see if you can slow down and identify what type of character best depicts the way you feel. Talking with your children about your own challenges with Monkey Mind will encourage them to talk with  you about their own as well.

-Shari Aronson

Shari is an exhibit developer at Minnesota Children's Museum, a yoga teacher for youth and adults, and a puppeteer with Z Puppets Rosenschnoz, an award-winning performance company that is one of the collaborators of Monkey Mind Pirates.


Monkey Mind Pirates is a puppetry, rock n' roll yoga adventure to help families reclaim calm -- beginning with a camp for kids ages 8-11 at the Camden Music School in North Minneapolis July 19-23 and culminating with public performances July 23-24.

More and more research shows that family meals have numerous benefits. According to the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University, children and teens whose families have frequent family dinners are:

• At lower risk for substance abuse
• Less likely to try cigarettes
• Less likely to try marijuana
• Less likely to try alcohol or get drunk monthly
• Likely to get better grades in school

Project EAT (Eating Among Teens) at the University of Minnesota found that family meals were associated with better intakes of fruits, vegetables, grains, calcium-rich foods and many other nutrients. They found that family meals were also associated with a lower intake of soft drinks and snack foods, and that girls who ate more frequent family meals exhibited less disordered eating such as extreme dieting behaviors and binge eating.

Start your family tradition of eating together when your children are young. Most families come together over a meal at dinnertime, but some find that breakfast works better for them. Turn off the television and other distractions (no cell phone conversations!) and focus on talking with each other. Children will learn a larger vocabulary, learn how to take turns, and hone other social skills. They will also learn about how the world works and how their parents feel about various issues.

You'll want to serve a variety of good foods, but there's no need to make the meal too elaborate. Involve your children in the meal preparation -- they may be more willing to eat something new when they help. Develop your own rituals and routines -- maybe pizza every Sunday evening, or a "breakfast" menu (such as pancakes fruit and sausage) served as dinner once a month. Kids will look forward to these special events (and remind you if you forget!).

Esther Schak,
Parent Educator, Saint Paul ECFE

Did you ever stop to think about how much time you spend telling your child what NOT to do?

It's easy to get caught up in all the things your children are doing wrong and forget about what they are doing right. Giving specific, positive attention to the behavior you want to see will teach your children what you do want them to do and will increase the likelihood of children repeating a positive behavior.

Here's how "catching your child being good" works:

You are enjoying an unusually calm shopping expedition with your child. Before your four-year-old has a chance to start climbing out of the cart or demanding a candy bar, you look at him and say, "Wow, Joey! It makes me so happy when you help me get the shopping done so quickly."

When dealing with challenging behavior, you may feel that your relationship with your children is strained. But taking the time to increase positive interactions with children can actually decrease those challenging behaviors.

Here are just a few ways to build positive relationships with your child:

• When playing, follow your child's lead.
• Really listen to your child when he or she is talking.
• Don't be afraid to be silly or get dirty.
• Have fun!  

Esther Schak
Parent Educator, Saint Paul ECFE

We'd like to welcome a new voice to the Smart Play blog: Esther Schak, an ECFE parent educator, who will be imparting some of the wisdom she has gained in her many years teaching classes for Saint Paul Public School's Early Childhood Family Education program.

Esther's posts will bring content from her classes straight to you to help you think about your interactions with your children in a new light.

Parenting for Friendship

All parents want their children to have friends. Here are some ways to help children develop friendships.

• Help build a positive self-image. Being able to reach out to others begins with a healthy self-concept. A good self-concept gives the child the confidence to try new things and meet new people.

• Provide a friendly model. “It’s Anne’s birthday; I think I’ll bake her favorite cake. “I do feel hurt that Marta and David didn’t invite us to the party.” “We’ll have to miss your game this one time. Our old neighbors are in town and we’re meeting them for dinner.”

• Provide opportunities for your child to be with other children.

• Allow your child to choose her own friends. Respect her choices even though you may not always understand them. The most important factor is that the relationships are nurturing to your child.

• Respect your child’s friendship style. Each child forms (or tries to form) friendships according to his own particular needs. Many children seem to need just one or two intimate friends, while others enjoy a large circle of friends.

• Help your child gain social skills. She needs to learn:

• How to start playing with someone, how to become part of a group, how to handle rejections.
• How to cooperate in pretend play, games, and choices; how to compromise.
• How to cooperate in pretend play, games, and choices; how to compromise.
• How to handle conflict – express feelings clearly, listen to others, and stand up for herself.

Esther Shack
Parent Educator, Saint Paul ECFE

At Minnesota Children's Museum, we support children in developing a positive view of themselves and their own culture. We also engage children in exploring other traditions so they can interact effectively with a variety of people.

Developing cultural competence results in an ability to understand, communicate with, and effectively interact with diverse people. One way the Museum supports these skills is by hosting exhibits such as Children of Hangzhou: Connecting with China, which opened earlier this month.

You can help your child build positive attitudes and cultural skills at home.

• Compare your family traditions with those in other cultures such as China. What and with whom do you celebrate? How are the celebrations alike and different?
  
• Try foods from other countries. Visit a restaurant or find an ethnic recipe to make at home. Use chopsticks at home and read the book How My Parents Learned to Eat by Ina Friedman, which tells how the author's Japanese mother and American father adapted to new cultures.
  
• Attend a cultural celebration.
  
• Look for experiences in which children encounter familiar things in new ways and new things in familiar ways.
  

Ann Boekhoff
Director of Special Projects, Minnesota Children's Museum

Social skills and thinking skills both develop through playing together with others. Group play lets children be dramatic, plan and rehearse roles, see alternatives to situations, build peer relationships, understand other perspectives, negotiate and cooperate, and experience success because they’ve created play that works for their needs. Adults can support social play at home and at the Museum by joining in with play, adding props to expand play, and organizing activities that encourage social interaction.